Bushie sez:
"You got a problem, yo I'll solve it, check out this hook while my DJ revolves it..."












PLUS:


 

There is something magical about an angry mob shouting profanities. Or printing them boldly on a sandwich board sign. But without practice, it's hard to know what you're 'Hey-Hey-Ho-Ho'ing and what specifically you are wanting, and when, in fact, your are wanting it to happen.

Here's a little sample of some of the more popular non-Gregorian chants of our day

“Hey Hey – Ho Ho: Imperialism Has Got To Go”
This is an oldie, but a goodie. Sub-in anything for “Imperialism.” Like: “The Oil-Lobby,” “Bush,” “Cheney,” “MSNBC News commentator Laura Ingraham”

 “What do we want?” “Peace” “When do we want it?” “Now!”
This is also an oldie, but what are you going to do? Since we currently have “peace” right “now”, (if you, like everyone else, ignores those daily No-Fly-Zone strikes), it’s kind of like a fortune cookie that informs you that you enjoy riches. Still, “When do we want it?” “Following the March 7 U.N. Report By Hans Blix” just doesn’t seem catchy enough.

Last Time We Listened To A Bush, We Wandered Around The Desert For 40 Years.
Takes a bit of time to say, write or understand, unless you’re kind of religious, but not so religious that equating the President to the disembodied miracle of God is neither sacrilegious, creepy, or awfully complimentary.

“No Blood For Oil”
Brit Hume of Fox News was complaining a few weeks ago that he didn’t understand this one. I know how he feels. It’s just so vague and convoluted in its message! What could it ever mean?! Damn subtle protesters!

“Drop Bush (or Acid) Not Bombs”
With the “Bush” line, you have some alliteration, and a double anti-war, anti-Bush message. With the latter, you have a very outdated notion, since nobody “drops” acid anymore. They “roll” E, or “candy-flip” or “pass U.N. resolutions” to achieve states of higher consciousness.

“Regime Change Begins At Home”
I assume they mean Bush, but they could also be referring to my Dad. Or our one cat, that’s white, who bosses around the other two cats.

“Buck Fush”
This isn’t really war specific, and it’s point is awfully diluted given how close it is to a “Pobody’s Nerfect” bumper sticker.

1-2-3-4 We don’t want your racist war”
I suppose the racism is based upon the fact it’s against Arabs, which would make it more of an Anti-Semitic war, although most equate that phrase solely with anti-Jewish sentiment. On the plus side, you get the rest of the line, which we used in summer camp: “5-6-7-8 in Cabin H they masturbate.”

“This is what democracy looks like”
Maybe the hope by chanting this is that the Iraqis will see what a Democracy Looks Like, and then not need the US to invade and make them have one. The converse of this chant is “This is what a police state looks like” is usually shouted when the cops arrive to protect storefronts, and maybe the hope is that the Iraqis will see what a Police State looks like, and then not need the US military to occupy them and make them have another one of those, too.

“The People, United, Will Never Be Defeated”
Beyond the fact that it’s impossible, without other forms of context, to tell whether this is a pro-war, anti-war, or even anti-protest protest chant, my issue is that it really doesn’t rhyme, I mean, the “ted” rhymes, but one is “eye-ted” and the other is “ee-ted” and that’s why it should be “The People, You United, Will Never Be Excited.” Or Delighted. Invited. Collided. Something.

“Let Exxon Send Their Own Troops”
A sassy rejoinder! And some would argue they are.

“War Begins With Dubya”
Clever. I suppose “Kwagmire Has A Dubya Too, If You Misspell It” is too complicated.

"Texas Has Oil, Lets Bomb It Too"
This is funny, Has T-Shirt potential, but brings up memories of Waco.

 “Fighting For Peace Is Like Fucking For Virginity”
It has everything: Sex, violence, profanity. The only thing lacking is a Bush pun, but I’ll leave that to you at home.

 

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